There are many aspects to building a strong relationship with your partner, and working on your relationship can offer you all sorts of benefits. The more effort you put in, the more rewarding the time spent together will be. Trusting each other is extremely important, as any relationship without trust is unlikely to succeed in the long term.
When your relationship was new and you were still getting to know each other, you would probably have spent a lot of time together, talking and finding out your likes and dislikes, hopes, dreams and fears. You would have tried many new things together, whether these were activities, foods, going to different places, or many other exciting possibilities. However, over time the fun and excitement will often disappear from a relationship, as the everyday tasks and routines begin to take over.
Moving in together, getting married and having children are all major decisions that you have probably made, but once these have happened, communication is often found to be lacking. The chores take up all of your time when you are not at work, and it seems that you just don’t have the time for each other any more.
If you can see that this is happening in your relationship, then now is the time to start doing something about it, before it becomes too late. It is more important than ever to spend time with each other, and talk like you used to do at the beginning of your relationship.
Even if you are both incredibly busy, find a few minutes each day to be together. After the kids have gone to bed, for example, just sit down on the sofa together and talk. Talking about anything that is bothering you can help to relieve the stress, and may bring you closer together as you share your problems.
Think about taking up a new hobby together. At the start of your relationship, you would probably have tried several different things. If you particularly enjoyed one of them, then go back to it. Alternatively, try a completely new sport, which neither of you have done before. Learn a new skill together. Remind yourselves of what you were like as a couple before life got in the way, and get back to the laughter and fun of those early times.
Another aspect of a relationship that will have been lost over time is the small, romantic gestures. Bringing home some flowers, or having a dinner by candlelight can make a big difference, so it is definitely worth making the effort to do things like this again. It is often the smallest gestures that make you feel closest to one another.
Relationships require both people to put in the effort, if it is going to work. Spending time together is something that you will do if you are serious about staying together long term, so even if it is just for a few minutes every day, talk to each other. You may find that it makes a surprising difference.